De stressing???

Saw T today. Was soooo angry at her it’s crazy. It wasn’t even her fault I was angry. She’d been ill, and didn’t get back in touch with me when I text her telling her I was really struggling.

Still am in fact. I am still perplexed by last weekends events. It still hurts. Really hurts. Like I cannot explain. I tried explaining it to T today, I’m not sure she understood how much it hurts.

It was good to see T though, and it will be hard not seeing her until the 2nd Jan, but to be honest I can’t really complain. It isn’t that long away.

in the mean time I think I’d like to maybe try put together some sort of logic reason for being here. Or not being here. I’m pleased I haven’t harmed myself. Pleased I’m still here, but that doesn’t make me want to be here. I guess life just hurts too much! Simple as that.

Life hurts, people hurts. Everything hurts.

On a plus note though, Christmas is looming, and I am very much looking forward to giving gifts to my family. Especially my Stepson, his GF and my SO. I cannot wait to have quality time with them 🙂

That’s what Christmas is all about.

Oh, just to add, I gave T a genuine hug today! I’m getting good at this hugging shit! 😀


5 thoughts on “De stressing???

  1. Maybe you got angry with her too because you feel safe with her and able to express yourself like that in her presence. Its only when we feel truly safe that we can let go like that. Happy xmas! Yay for hugs, too. XX

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: