Saw T today. I was actually really honest and told her 100% how I feel. She has advised me to go see my GP to get some anti-depressants. So I guess I’ll do that next week. She has also said that we will not be doing any more memory work until she thinks I feel strong enough to.
We chatted about stuff and T said it sounds like SOs mum is some sort of trigger for the feelings I have about my own mother causing me to have anxiety feelings when I see her. It makes sense but how does that help me? She has also said that she thinks I just basically have too much on my plate right now. So I think she is gonna try help me deal with what is going on now.
She did say she thinks the past is more difficult for me than I actually realise and the work we have been doing could be what has made me fall so low mood wise.
She knows how I feel though. I was honest about my thoughts about su and cutting. She has taken me seriously and said I should email if I need to. I hope I will be ok.
Things still feel pretty pointless.