So i had my dentist appointment today. We were doing really well! Then once we arrived we just kinda went into a fizzle of anxiety! The receptionist even changed which dentist we were seeing to get us in quicker. I was trying to hold it together, obviously she could tell i was nervous though! I was actually very close to walking out and telling my SO to reschedule. I kept waiting though, for a horrible 20-30 mins, until i was called in! Gosh i was so scared. The dentist just checked my teeth and i told her what happened at the last dentist.
She read the form we’d filled and asked what we meant by anxiety issues which we’d written in the others box. I just said PTSD, which we were diagnosed with anyway. I didn’t mention DID. She was pleasant and compassionate though. Explaining everything she was doing. It went okay i guess, but i couldn’t wait to be home, and i feel like I’ve climbed a mountain I’m that tired. Facing fears is damn hard!!! I can’t even face this one in my own time, it has to be done now!
She was going to do a scale and polish for maintenance, but i think the terror in my face said she’d be better waiting until i saw her next. She has booked me in for an hour appointment, where she wants to do a scale and polish, and root canal treatment on my problem tooth 😦 She has said that any pain at all, and she will stop! Put more dressing on to kill the nerve, then try again a week or so later! So she is not going to hurt me!
I’ve booked my appointment for 21st November. Not excited about it, but i have to get it over and done with! I need to man the fuck up! Roll on getting this over and done with, then i don’t have to worry about it any more!
As a reward for our efforts today, I bought more things to bake with. In my kitchen this evening, i found fresh sultana scones, cooling on a wire rack, and fresh cupcakes with pink butter-cream icing in the fridge. Yummy. Jessie and Bee have apparently enjoyed themselves baking. Thank you G’ma for helping them.